Il rimedio alla fattanza: cosa fare se hai fumato troppo

zucchero rimedio se hai fumato troppo

Ragazzi, avete presente quando fumate troppo e vi sentite male? Pensateci ora, perché quando ci sarete dentro non avrete le forze per cercare su internet: cosa fare se ho fumato troppa erba…

Non date colpa a chissà quale schifo c’era dentro a quello che vi hanno venduto, ai drink che vi siete scolati, al freddo che avete preso e il caldo afoso che vi abbatte. È che siete un po’ ciofeche e avete fumato troppo. Anche io sono un po’ ciofeca.
L’altra sera ero con questo tipo che mi interessa. Bene. Scopro che anche lui si fa le canne. Bene.
Abbiamo deciso di fumare perché eravamo sulle spine entrambi. Le canne ti fanno parlare. Così abbiamo iniziato a parlare. Eravamo fuori da un locale, in piedi, con i drink in mano che stanno iniziando a diventare troppo freddi perché sta iniziando a fare freddo.
Così, a un tratto, mentre lui raccontava di voler costruire case ecologiche per gli sfollati e io annuivo sorridendo, m’è venuto lo svarione.
– Chissà che cavolo ci hanno messo dentro a quella roba, poi co’ sto drink congelato e il pensiero di quei poveri sfollati…
Sono diventata pallida che, in confronto, Mortisia pare ‘na lampadata. La chimica m’è salita troppo in fretta.
– Vuoi un kebab?
Al solo pensiero m’è venuto un conato.
Lui non s’è spostato di un millimetro. Un vero Signore.
– Avresti bisogno di un quadretto di cioccolata, mio zio dice che quando ti prende così devi ingerire zuccheri e ti ripigli subito… Ho capito va’, ti prendo acqua e zucchero.
E ve lo devo dire, ragazzi. Dopo dieci minuti di respirazione da partoriente e dopo aver avuto il coraggio di chiedergli di stare un attimo zittino perché ogni parola era un pugno nello stomaco, m’è passato gran parte del malessere. Così lui ha potuto riprendere a parlare delle sue case ecologiche riaccompagnandomi a casa, senza mai più farsi vivo

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